Here you'll find recipes and recommendations from one eat-to-liver to another.  Live-to-eaters should go somewhere else.  (Nothing personal--but you aren't likely to find happiness here.)

I've tried and tried, but so far I've found no viable alternative to eating.  But it's such a burden.  I keep forgetting to do it--and then all of a sudden I get weak and shaky and just have to find something to stuff in.  At those times, there's rarely anything handy, so I end up stuffing in whatever's in the back of the fridge that isn't too green.  (The green vegies, if any, are by this time brown and slimy, maybe black.)

So it's always an emergency.

Contents (I'm just getting started, so there isn't much here yet.)


What to buy

Tips and Tricks


Easy Cold Cheese Sandwich

Two slices of bread
One slice of cheese
Put the cheese between the slices of bread so it doesn't get the mousepad greasy when you set it down.

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Easy Real Cool Hot Cold Cheese Sandwich

Split an English muffin and toast both halves.  (If you don't have a toaster, you can stick a fork in each half and toast them over the stove.)
Put a slice of cold cheese (Swiss is best) straight from the fridge in between the hot muffin halves.

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Magic Pudding

Never heard of it?  It's the easiest sweetest dessert you'll ever cook.  All you do is boil some water and you get sort of a soft caramel when it's done.

  1. Buy a can of Carnation Sweetened Condensed Milk.  No substitutes.  It has to be sweetened condensed milk.
  2. Put the can into a pot or something like that and cover it with water.  It will probably float, but put in enough water so that it would be covered if it didn't float.  That's how big a pot to use.
  3. Put the pot on the stove and make the water boil.
  4. Turn down the heat until the water quits bubbling, but is still almost boiling.  Cooks call that "simmering."
  5. Keep it that way for three hours.  Use a timer!!!
  6. Check it every half hour.  You'll have to add water several times to keep the can wet.
  7. Be sure to keep the can wet.  If it goes dry, it becomes a bomb.  My mother found this out the hard way once when she went out and the water boiled away.  The can blew up and spread this delicius caramel stuff all over the kitchen ceiling.
  8. At the end of the three hours, pour the water out and stick the can into the fridge for a few hours, until it feels cold.  You can eat it out of the can with a spoon if you want.
If you want to be fancy and share the Magic Pudding with someone else--
  1. With a can opener, cut out both ends of the can.
  2. Push one can-end into the can to slide the contents out the other end.
  3. As the stuff comes out, take a knife and slice off sections--about a centimeter (1/2 inch) thick is about right for most people to start with.
  4. To store it in the fridge, put it on a plate or something.  Otherwise it'll make the shelf sticky.
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3 Minute Emergency Spaghetti

Boil a couple cups of water in a pot and then dump in a package of Ramen noodles.  Dump in the noodles, not the package.  Throw away the little foil packet of salt and grease and "flavoring."  Boil the noodles for exactly 3 minutes.  Use your watch or a timer!  Even you don't want soggy noodles.

After 3 minutes (exactly), turn off the heat and pour off the water.  Dump the noodles onto a plate or something.  Squirt on a lot of ketchup.  Or use catsup if that's what you have.  Eat it with a fork--and watch out for your shirt.

If you want some meat and have a hotdog, you can boil it along with the noodles, but wait until 1.5 minutes have elapsed before dropping it into the water.  If you find the hot dog too late for that, microwave it for about 30 seconds and add it to the noodles and ketchup.

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Almost instant chicken noodle soup with lots of noodles

While the 6 ounces of water is heating in the microwave (2 mintues) or on the stove (longer, and you need a clean pot), sprinkle a little salt and pepper into a big coffee mug.  (It's easier to hold a mug than a bowl.)  You can put the salt and pepper in later, but it's easier to see how much you're putting in if the mug is empty.

Then open a packet of Lipton's "Cup-a-Soup"--I use the "Chicken Noodle With White Meat" kind--and dump the contents into the mug.

Then grab a bunch of "angel hair" size spaghetti--a bunch about 1/4 to 1/2 inch in diameter, depending on how hungry you are.  No other kind of spaghetti will do, only angel hair, which cooks in 3 minutes.  Everything else takes too long to get soft.   (However, you can use some Ramen noodles in an emergency.  They get soft in 3 minutes, too.)   Break the angel hair into short, spoon-size pieces as you drop them into the mug.

By this time, the water should be hot.  Pour it into the mug and stir it up with your soup spoon.  That will cool the water, so put the mug into the microwave for about 20 seconds and then stir it again.  Sometimes I zap it again for a few seconds--but be careful not to let it boil all over the inside of the microwave.

The Cup-a-Soup noodles will go soft almost immediately, and they tend to floa, to you can start right in to eat while the angel hair noodles are softening.  The broth will thicken as the angel hair softens.  This makes the texture of the soup change as you work your way down.  Sometimes that's interesting.

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These recipes brought to you by the Culinary Arts Division of Abstract Concrete Works

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